The Road I Took
My personal transformative journey began with a series of early struggles and tragic events. Growing up in a controlling and repressive environment where I couldn't express myself authentically I remember always feeling deeply lonely and alienated. I felt the weight of social constraints outside of my control and longed for personal liberation, a supportive community, and a chance to discover who I authentically was. Starting my young adult life in this mindset, I came immediately into extremely challenging times, and through navigating them, I realized the transformative power of compassion and showing up vulnerably and bravely in the face of fear. This became a guiding light in my life, illuminating the path towards authenticity and personal growth. Even after 21 years, I still walk this winding path.
TAfter separating with my first love at 21 due to an unhealthy dynamic, I handled the situation immaturely, cutting off all contact, unaware of the impact it would have on his life. Tragically, he spiraled into a cycle of self-destructive behavior, which culminated in him dropping out of college, joining the army and being sent to Baghdad during the initial invasion of the Iraq war, where he saw and possibly participated in untold horrors, further compromising his precarious mental health. Shortly after he returned home, he took his own life.
The devastating events of 9/11 also left an indelible mark on my life in a more direct way. Witnessing the collapse of the Twin Towers from the early morning bakery classroom of the Culinary Institute of America I immediately grieved for the further loss of lives and a country I knew would soon be consumed by fear an a need for retribution. That day, I was just about 4 weeks away from graduating culinary school and had plans to work in the restaurant that sat at the top of one of those towers. But life took a turn, and being above the impact zone, everyone there died that day including the chef I was anxiously awaiting the opportunity to work with, as we helplessly watched on TV. In the weeks that followed, it felt utterly obscene worrying about my own career in the face of such tremendous loss. I found myself at a crossroads.
Caught in the crossfire of grief and uncertainty, I spontaneously uprooted my life and followed a job offer to Bend, Oregon, sight unseen. Little did I know that this would be my new sanctuary, and I would find a small psychedelic community characterized by openness, love, self-reflection, and a strong sense of interconnectedness who would take me into their fold and begin to teach me hoe to truly live. It was here that I discovered the transformative power of psychedelics. Finally feeling like I was on a path to healing and self actualization, one afternoon I abruptly received an anonymous email containing a link to the obituary of my past lover. It was this final blow that eventually lead to me utterly breaking apart and confronting both the darkness and light within my own nature.
This heart-wrenching series of event left me burdened with deep pain, guilt, and sadness. Although I acknowledge that I am not responsible for his actions, I carried the weight of knowing that I could have perhaps played a role in positively influencing his life if I had possessed better communication and conflict management skills, and faced my fears head-on, thus changing things just enough to have lead to another outcome. This profound realization ignited a calling to commit to a life of doing no harm and finding purpose in my own existence.
Through personal exploration over the next two decades, I embarked on my own transformative journey, and eventually aided others on theirs, and gained profound insight into the immense potential of psychedelics as a catalyst for personal growth and healing. Through the ability to truly see myself, my gifts and my flaws, and my place among things, I was able to make the mindset and lifestyle choices necessary to find true peace within my soul and a sense of purpose. This deep understanding led me to transition from a career that long since had left me feeling trapped and uninspired to becoming the psychedelic guide and coach I am today. It is now my mission to use my experience and wisdom to accompany others on their path towards healing and personal growth.
Through my journey, I remain committed to living a life that counterbalances the ugliness, pain, tragedy, and cruelty that can exist in the world, and from time to time, in all of us. I striver the ability to look back on my actions with pride, and see I was focused on the principles of compassion, empathy, and love in all of my actions. My commitment to personal growth and dedication to helping others on their healing paths had made me into what I truly believe to be a compassionate and insightful guide.
My story is a testament to the transformative power of psychedelics and the importance of facing our own darkness to find light and purpose. My personal experiences, wounds, and growth have cultivated empathy and wisdom necessary to guide others through their transformative journeys.
With Myco-Vision, I offer a sacred space for individuals to explore their authentic selves, heal deep wounds, and experience personal growth in a supportive and compassionate environment.
Life's journey can be filled with pain, tragedy, and despair, but my story is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of psychedelics. Through my work, I offer a guiding light to those who seek personal growth, healing, and a life lived with authenticity and purpose.